Welcome back old friend...

Photo: ombites

It's time. I've been itching to get the words down and having a outlet to do it. A friend suggested I start blogging, ha...so welcome back old friend.

The most significant thing that has happened since January is that I am now single after 9 years. This only happened several weeks ago. It has been seriously quite incredible and the most amicable break up I have ever had. We love each other dearly but our love just became a different kind of love. We know each other far too well to want to hold each other back or even hurt one another so really, how very adult. A little sad for both of us because we will lose each other to silence while we adjust, but also very exciting. For the moment we are still living together.

Now fast forward a couple of weeks, from a few too many days/nights drinking and obliterating ourselves while being completely indulgent and a little too naughty (me, in a different state), to today. The day after the first Jivamukti Yoga Sydney immersion. Jivamukti Yoga Sydney is now official. And it's nice to be back. It's nice to be back in Sydney and it's nice to be back to where my heart, mind (and body) belongs - yoga!

This past week we were blessed and honoured to have David Life and Sharon Gannon (Jivamukti Yoga founders) and Yogeswari (Senior Advanced Certified Jivamukti Yoga Teacher) come to Australia and guide us through a 5 day immersion. Our own teachers likened it to a mini yoga teacher training so you can imagine, it was intense - think 10 hour days with asana, chanting, meditation and scripture. It was brilliant and overwhelming. I am still processing it all and will be processing it for a long time to come. If anything, the immersion has reinforced how real and a part of my life yoga is - living and breathing it, even when I fall off the wagon. I won't write too much more about it because it could go on for pages and pages but here are my Facebook updates to give an idea of how I felt each day.

Jivamukti Yoga Immersion - Day 1 - Facebook Status - 04/04

On the path of an early morning meander (photo of a sign that said FREE)...maybe a sign of what's to come this week - yogash chitta vritti nirodhah ||2||. Of course only after all the challenges, breakdowns, lightbulb moments and love that comes with a week long Jivamukti yoga immersion, and will continue to happen well after the immersion is over.

Jivamukti Yoga Immersion - Day 2 - Facebook Status - 05/04

Realised she's only scared because she stopped breathing. We come into life w/ an inhale, we go out of life w/ an exhale. Keep it constant and strong. Best ujjayi breathing session ever, thank you Yogeswari Azahar. To KE for being my breathing partner + SJP for getting me up into my first dishevelled handstand, love. Bring on Day 2 x

Jivamukti Yoga Immersion - Day 2 - Facebook Status - 05/04

Jivamukti Yoga Immersion ~ Day 2 reflection. When in doubt, "On this path effort never goes to waste and there is no failure. Even a little effort will protect you from the greatest fear (death)." BG:2:40

Jivamukti Yoga Immersion - Day 3 - Facebook Status - 06/04

Jivamukti Yoga Immersion ~ Day 3. Reflection after another 10 hour day. Spiritually sunburnt but after the burn (and layers shed) comes that golden glow, right? Another gem, "How we treat others will determine how others treat us. How others treat us will determine how we see ourselves. How we see ourselves will determine who we are."

Jivamukti Yoga Immersion - Day 4 - Facebook Status - 07/04

Jivamukti Yoga Immersion ~ Day 4. Felt like a total yogi fraud today. David Life gave some serious adjustments + then there were silent tears. Practice is nowhere near potential, physically or mentally - humbling. Magic is a shift in perception, right? At first you can't do but then you can...it just takes a little more effort and grace. It's not all about the asana either. This practice challenges your whole being.

Jivamukti Yoga Immersion - Day 5 - Facebook Status - 08/04

Jivamukti Yoga Immersion ~ Day 5. To conclude, but it never really ends. Yoga is not for everyone but if you want answers to your questions, get on the mat + just do your practice. Discover it for yourself. Jivamukti Yoga Sydney + to our blessed teachers, much love + thanks x

So welcome back old friend...let's see how this journey unfolds now that I am single (and want to be single) and yoga will be my primary focus. The aim is to attend Jivamukti Yoga Teacher Training in New York in 2012.

** Oh, and I tried power yoga for two weeks and loved it. Learned to love the hot room and will go back again but my true love is still with the Jivamukti Yoga method. It's nice to mix it up a bit though and try different methods. I have met so many more wonderful yogis this way and starting to feel more of that "global community" thing happening where it doesn't matter what race, religion....or type of yoga you do - we all want the same thing ultimately, liberation.

So now I've got some blog reading catch up to do....I wonder who's still around...

2011. How very nice to meet you.

My intention for 2011: "Standing in tadasana without apology" ~ David Life

2010. Thank you. You threw so many curve balls my way that I did actually end up crumbling. I lost my connection to the earth and couldn't find my feet there for a while. I stopped my yoga sadhana practice when I needed it more than ever and I ate everything and anything in sight (except for the flesh of animals!). But now it's 2011 and I've found my feet again, albeit 10kg heavier and a lot less flexible. It's good to feel the ground and be in control again.

Mum had a stroke early November and while she is still with us, her ability to walk and use her right arm has been affected. It's been tough for Mum and the family but it has pulled us all together.

Around this time I also went through the process of getting my half-sleeve tattoo. Maiden, Mother, Crone - Triple Goddess. It represents all the amazing, inspiring women in life both past, present and future. I chose roses, traditional as they are, for my mother who adores them.

A lot of other poignant moments occurred during this time also which relate, like moving house for the second time in a year. 2010, you were a bitch but I wouldn't have it any other way. I normally don't need reminding of what's most important to me but sadly it took a debilitating illness to stop all the excess noise to drop everything and really look at what was going on around me.

I've tried to do the resolutions thing in the past, the 100 things in 1001 days, the 365 photo thing but I'm keeping it simple in 2011. This year is about getting back to basics by being committed to less. I'm putting my Nutritional Medicine studies on indefinite hold because it's time consuming and financially exhausting. I was also depressed for the majority of 2010 because of the constant time/money debt and living in an apartment that was not a good fit. So my focus is already on my family, my yoga sadhana practice and work only now that we have moved into a place we can finally call home again.

2011. How very nice to meet you. I look forward to planting new seeds, watching them grow whilst pruning the old.

"What is sadhana? It’s a committed prayer. It is something which you want to do, have to do, and which is being done by you. Sadhana is self-enrichment. It is not something which is done to please somebody or to gain something. Sadhana is a personal process in which you bring out your best." ~ Yogi Bhajan

Transformation Celebration, Jasmine Tarkeshi

Photo: Jasmine Tarkeshi from Laughing Lotus

I am so grateful to have had the uplifting opportunity to practice with Jasmine Tarkeshi from Laughing Lotus over the weekend, even more so because Australia is a long way to travel from New York/California.

The first day with Jasmine was a 3 hour Gita Vinyasa workshop where Jasmine based her dharma talk on the Bhagavad Gita - "If you want to be free Arjuna, Perform every action as worship". We were inspired to fight our inner and outer battles with courage, devotion, faith and wisdom. I still haven't read the Bhagavad Gita so it was nice to get the street version of what it means and how we can apply the lessons from this story to our lives. To have this idea that everything we do has meaning and to practice each asana with devotion certainly made a difference to my practice over the entire weekend. I definitely need to get a copy of the Bhagavad Gita and read it.

On the second day, it was a 3 hour Shiva’s Cosmic Vinyasa workshop. The dharma talk was about transformation (and duality) merging movement, music, mudras and meditation into a flowing vinyasa dance of intense devotion and self-discovery. Jasmine's idea of devotion and self-discovery lends itself to a lot of fun as well. The poses and her sequences were all about letting go and just being in the moment, seeing how far we can go once we actually do let go.

Jasmine has such a grace and honesty about her that it was very easy to connect to. She is so accessible. Plus, she was wearing a Jimi Hendrix t-shirt, kudos from me already - ha! A big heads up and thank you to Samadhi Yoga for organising Jasmine to come out and teach us. Workshops like this are a great way to get the yoga community together not only from Samadhi but other studios as well. I can't wait to get back to New York and check out her studio.

It feels so good to be re-inspired about my practice again....hence Yovember. Practicing every day for 30 days and see what it brings up, what I learn and what I don't.

Photo: Jasmine Tarkeshi teaching at Samadhi Yoga